When You Truly Look

 She was beyond angry. She was furious. You could tell by how she placed her hands on the counter in front of you. Palms flat and leaning forward, she was threatening you with her gaze as if to say that emotion was a weakness. But that gave you the chance to truly look at her. You copied her posture, noting how all the pressure was in her arms as though sheer will was holding her up. The faint tremble in her form as she willed the pain away. You looked in her eyes but instead of glaring back,  you searched them for the weakness that was hidden there. For anything to prove that she would be okay and that she wasn't completely lost. But you found nothing.

The dark brown eyes that had once softened hearts, that had once held so much promise and hope were empty and stolen of anything good. Then you remembered all the hurt and pain that she had suffered through all the years.

A soft tear tripped down your face and her expression broke, her arms collapsing as she allowed the smallest bit of emotion into her gaze and allowed you to truly see beyond her exterior.

In a flash of a moment, you saw the anguish and the anger and the fear that she works so hard to hide away. She used to be an open book, but over time, this book was torn and abused to the point that she no longer trusts anyone enough to share her story.

Her soft brown eyes became wet and she finally allowed herself a moment to feel. It was overwhelming and heartbreaking to watch her fall apart all over again. All the walls that she painstakingly put up to protect herself were frighteningly weak. They wouldn't last another hit.

She leaned over and splashed cold water on her face, droplets splattering the glass in front of her. Looking up once more she allowed herself one last glance at who she was in the mirror before sealing herself up again and hiding her emotions once more.

By Brianna Rae

Who am I?

I am a daughter.

I am a sister.

I am family.

I am 18.

I am a college student.

I am 

I am not who you think I am. You may look at me and see confidence. A pretty face, maybe. You might even see a real smile and laugh. But that is not truly me.